A week?! It’s been a whole week since I’ve seen my devoted little demons? Oh, how I’ve missed you – well, I mean, as much as I miss people ever. I do apologize, truly – life had a way of getting away from me this past week, and even in my occasional spare moment I was exceedingly tired. As an ancient evil wizard, my body doesn’t tend to like seasonal changes, and the weather swings this past week have been rather painful for me. But don’t worry – nothing a few slaughtered villages can’t cure!
But in my return, I knew I needed to do something special – and something special is indeed what I bring you. Tonight, we bring the heat to #FrozenFoodFridays – as we explore the outcome of my attempts to create homemade alfredo sauce! And it still counts, because I guarantee that at some point, something I used was frozen somewhere in transport.
Now, like any good recipe, you need ingredients. So here you go:
3 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons olive oil
3 cloves garlic, minced
2 cups heavy whipping cream
1/4 teaspoon white pepper
1/8 teaspoon black pepper
1/8 teaspoon red pepper flakes
1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese
3/4 cup mozzarella cheese
In a medium saucepan, melt the butter with the olive oil over medium-low heat. Next, add the garlic, cream, white pepper, black pepper, and red pepper flakes. Bring the mixture to a simmer.
Now comes a VERY IMPORTANT POINT. From this point forward, you should just basically plan on stirring constantly the rest of the time. Not occasionally, not frequently…the whole fucking time. Trust me – it just works out better that way.
Add the parmesan cheese and simmer and stir for 8 minutes or until sauce has thickened and the consistency is smooth. Then add the mozzarella cheese and continue stirring until the sauce is smooth.
And there you have it! My version above is a peppery take on alfredo sauce – for slightly less kick, eliminate the black pepper and crushed red pepper. I have made this a couple of times now, and I feel it has turned out quite well. Try it over your favorite pasta ASAP!
So with that, I will bid you goodnight, kids. I will try to make amends for my prolonged absence, but until next time, remember – if you are still supporting Donald Trump at this point, then when you are registering to vote for him you should just take an extra minute to also register as a sex predator. It’ll save you some time down the road. – EWE