See, a good authority figure would make you eat your dinner before offering a treat. But an Evil one? Oh, it’s straight to the dessert this week on #FrozenFoodFridays!
As you can see, I’ve brought you a classic this week – Breyer’s Oreo Cookies and Cream ice cream. Now, I’m not going to beat around the bush here – there’s little in the way of “prep” to this. I mean, I guess you could run your scoop under water to make scooping the ice cream a bit smoother…but really, why the fuck aren’t you just eating it straight out of the carton? This is objectively the best ice cream on the face of the earth – there’s no “too much of a good thing” here. Take it out of the freezer and enjoy.
Oh, and protip: keep to of these in the freezer. One is your standard dessert carton. The other is there for when you’ve had a traumatic, depressing experience – that one you open and eat from start to finish in one go, stopping only to sob. Don’t look at me! Don’t judge me! You know you do it too, goddammit!
And that’s it for this week’s #FrozenFoodFridays, boys and girls. Now, if you’ll excuse me, there’s a gallon of ice cream, and a lot of regret to follow, waiting in my freezer. – EWE