#FrozenFoodFridays – End of the World Edition?

Well, humans…you had a good run.  I mean, not really – but hey, I’m trying to let you go out with some dignity here, which is a far cry from the way you wiped out so many other species over the years, including SOME OF YOUR OWN PEOPLE.  But sadly, all awful experiments have to come to an end sometime, and for you that time is now.  Some of you are definitely not that bad, and I will genuinely miss a few, but it’s the other several billion that ruin it for you.  So, I’m afraid it’s meteors, tidal waves, and my newest experiment, fire tornadoes across the globe.  Sorry, nothing you can do now to stop it.  Nothing can change my mind.  I’ve had enough.  Nothing could…possibly…

…………….GODDAMMIT, Alanah!  Now what am I supposed to do, huh?!  I can’t destroy that!  LOOK AT THAT!  IT’S FUCKING ADORABLE!  Now thanks to you and Chelsea (I love you Chelsea, you’re adorable, don’t ever ever change) 5.99 billion mouthbreathers are going to get to continue fucking up the earth, and more importantly, MY LIFE!  Fine then – but when I finally make good on taking a trip to SF, you owe me a drink!  You know…after the, like, 20 I probably owe you for all the good shit you’ve done.

Anyway…I guess since I’m NOT going to vaporize you all now, it’s time for #FrozenFoodFridays.  Once again, I’m cheating a bit this week, as the item in question may be frozen, or may not.  And if it is, you’re gonna want to thaw it before you get started.  But fuck it – it counts.  So here are EWE’s secret/created in a drunken stupor and can’t remember anything exact recipe Cilantro Lime Swordfish Steaks!

Commence drooling, mortals.

Required Ingredients:

  1. Swordfish Steaks, frozen or fresh (if frozen, be sure to thaw first; if not, um, don’t).
  2. Limes, several (in case you missed it last time, I’m not big on numbers – just get a bunch).
  3. Cilantro, 1 bunch washed and chopped (if on the fence about how much to use, err on the side of MORE CILANTRO).
  4. Olive Oil (a small amount to grease the baking dish).

Optional Ingredients:

  1. Lemon (use sparingly, as it combines well but can overpower the lime, which defeats the whole purpose)
  2. Garlic, 1 clove, minced (I love garlic in almost anything – but sometimes just the simple cilantro and lime combo is very refreshing.  Try both and see what you prefer!)
  3. Black Pepper / Crushed Red Pepper (see comment for garlic above).
  4. Liquor (not actually an ingredient, but tends to help me think I’m not fucking up too badly).

Preheat your oven to 425 degrees.

Grease a baking dish using a small amount of olive oil.  Place the fish steaks in the baking dish.  Cut several of the limes in half and squeeze them over the fish until the steaks are covered and surrounded by lime juice.  Cut a remaining lime into slices and place these on and around the fish steaks in the baking dish.  Now cover everything with the chopped cilantro.  If you have used any optional ingredients, add those at this time as well.  In a small bowl, squeeze a few more limes to be used to baste during baking.

Place the baking dish on the middle oven rack, uncovered, and bake for 15-20 minutes, basting occasionally, until the fish is easy to flake with a fork.  Serve garnished with a fresh lime or lemon slice, if desired.

So I hope you enjoyed #FrozenFoodFridays once again, as well as the world not ending.  You can thank Alanah and Chelsea.  I did get a small measure of revenge though – while she was playtesting a VR game, I projected an image of my face into her headset.

Ah…good times! – EWE


Why Geeks Rule the World

Greets, little ones.  You are all witness at this moment to an exceedingly rare cosmic event – I am honestly, genuinely happy because of a group of humans.  I know, I know – even I am kind of shocked.  Particularly after that absolute dumpster fire of a debate last night, I thought for certain that I would be here just frothing at the mouth and ready to strangle the first person within reach.  But then…then this happened.

EWE’s actual heart is jet black and much smaller, but you get the idea.

As most of you that have been following for a bit are aware, I am an unabashed fan of IGN‘s podcasts and the incredibly talented men and women that make them happen.  Podcast BEYOND and Podcast UNLOCKED, and more specifically the amazing people behind them – AlanahMartyMaxBrianAndrewRyan, and so many more – showed kindness and friendship to a complete nobody halfway across the country at a time when I needed it more than anything.  They had nothing to gain by doing so, but they did it anyway – because they are just good people.  The absolute best.

So knowing this, their latest act of kindness and generosity comes as no surprise to me, but is no less heartwarming.  Recently, a fan of the shows, Zach Carlson, wrote in to tell the story of how the recent advent of VR gaming had been very meaningful for his family – as his blind, autistic brother had fallen in love with it the moment he had tried it.  Zach went on to describe something that I, and anyone that has a loved one that suffers from autism, wanted to weep when I heard – that his brother said being in the VR world was the first time in his life that he felt “normal.”  After sharing his touching story, Zach explained that he was now saving up to try and secure a Playstation VR system for his brother in time for Christmas.

Most people would say what a nice story that is, and then move on.  But not the IGN family – they decided to lend their hands, their voices, toward helping Zach reach his goal and then some.  Alanah started a GoFundMe and reached out to the gaming community in hopes of getting funding to provide Zach’s family with a PSVR and maybe even some games to go with it.

Gamers get a really bad rap.  People condemn them and their hobby as pointless and childish, and even within the community there can be vitriol and strife.  But when push comes to shove, the gaming community has each other’s backs like no other group in the world.


In less than four hours, the fundraiser brought in more than three times the goal it was aiming for.  Zach’s family would not only get a PSVR and every available game for the system, but be able to donate to a charity of their choosing as well.  And all of this was due to a group of gamers, of journalists, of podcast hosts, but most importantly, of absolutely fucking amazing people, who decided once again to show kindness for no reason other than because they could.

Support Zach’s GoFundMe, support IGN and their podcasts, and most importantly, humans, support one another.  There may be a disgusting, vulgar sexual predator running for the presidency – but the most important people in this world are the ones that take care of one another.  Yeah…even an Evil Wizard can help his own sometimes.  And I’m happy to do so.  Until next time, minions – take care of yourselves and one another. – EWE